Now I know that being a Conservapedia sysop involves an enormous amount of cognitive dissonance (especially when you have to grin and agree with more of Andrew Schlafly’s daily insanity), but there are times when you can only laugh out loud at the things they say.
Take for example Brian MacDonald’s (sysop Karajou – so much for Conservapedia’s policy of “use your real first name and initial, which is a blockable offence if you don’t) claim about Wikipedia’s sysops:
All I could think of when I read this was the fact that most of the “trusted” admins there reached that level by vitue (sic) of lying, bullying, falsly-accusing, acting like SlimVirgin, etc.
Ok, lying? Which is something Schlafly does on a regular basis. Not to mention Terry Koeckritz, with his claims of having met everybody from Lucile Ball to Nancy Reagan (Actually, apparently our Terry pushed her to the floor and covered her with his body during an assassination attempt. Always good to know CP sysops are more alert – and closer – than the Secret Service). But don’t take my word for it, as Andy Schlafly complained once before, “He claimed to know Jerry Falwell and Ed Meese; he claimed to dine with Mary and Jim Carville; he even claimed to have fallen on Nancy Reagan during an assassination attempt.”
As for bullying. Well one would have to say that CP is well represented in that regard. One only has to recall the high regard in which Andy held the obnoxious Bugler (who turned out to be a wonderful parodist, playing Andy like a cheap fiddle), over the objections of a number of his hand-picked goons.
John Patti isn’t really clever enough to indulge in bullying, and simply hides behind his ban-hammer. Terry Koeckritz, of course, is well known for getting sexual gratification from his online bullying, something he has perfected on sites such as Hot or Not (thanks for the info, by the way, but as promised, I won’t publish it), RationalWiki and Conservapedia, where even head goon Ed Poor is on record as saying he does not want Terry involved in their behind the scenes chat room, the Zeugloden Blues. Still, I suppose I shouldn’t be too hard on Terry, he has made most of the discussions available once again.
Then there’s TerryH (or Terry Hurlbut as he was named, aka Temlakos), the self-proclaimed custodian of the Conservative Bible Project (and apparently a qualified doctor). Not content with blaming the death of that Harry Potter actor on “multi-culturism” (maybe that’s why they’ve made it a blockable offence on CP – multi-culturism, I mean, not murder), he also launched into a quite incredible rant on somebody’s talk page (original here, let’s see how long until it gets burned), which started off:
Sir, you just called me a liar with regard to released Gitmo prisoners going right back to the battlefield and doing the exact same thing all over again that they landed at Gitmo for in the first place: killing Americans.
You had better do one of three things:
- Provide a citation for your allegation that a significant proportion of Guantanamo detainees have turned out to be innocent of the war crimes imputed to them.
- Retract your last comment and apologize to me.
- Prepare to face blockage for contempt of the administration.
Blockage? Really? Is Conservapedia low in fibre? The conversation sort of went downhill from there. Other gems (from the same discussion) include:
- mind your tone when you talk to me. I’m an administrator and you’re not.
- I ought to block you just for using words like “childish” even if it is on your talk page. Retract that remark right now or you will get blocked just for that.
- don’t you ever, EVER, tell another administrator what to do on this site.
Oh, what the hell, here’s a few more of TerryH’s specialities:
- I will not dignify that question with an answer. Besides, that question is incompetent, irrelevant, and immaterial.
- Cease and desist your obvious contempt for the administration, or risk a block just for that.
- Impugning [a sysop’s] motives without warrant, and challenging his authority, are [blockable offences].
Then we get Brian MacDonald (he of the 20-year naval career, but no rank to show for it). Admittedly, it was resident cultist Mormon, Dean Slade, who coined the “Mind Your Own Business” block reason, but Brian is easily one of it’s most eager proponents, as per this example. He’s also gone on record for insisting that a editor (wait for it) go to the library, take out a specific book, find the passage in question and read it to Karajou, before he’s allowed to use it as a reference in an article. He’s also from the Andy Schlafly school that “If I make a bullshit statement and you query it, the onus is on you to prove me wrong, rather than me back up my insanity.” Here’s a good example.
Not content with sending editors to the library, he also wants them to engage in archaeological digs on his behalf. This is one of his more bizarre utterances, in defence of Noah’s Ark:
Tell you what, since he’s here to demand that we accept his viewpoint, I’m going to make a demand of my own. Jamesmackenzie, since you came to this particular page with the intention of pushing your opinion that Noah’s Ark did not exist, I’m going to call you on it. According to the Bible, Genesis 8, the ark rested in ”the mountains of Ararat”. You, Jamesmackenzie, are going to scour the area once known as the Kingdom of Urartu, which now is occupied by eastern Turkey, northern Iraq, and northwestern Iran, and I don’t care how you do it. You can use Google-Earth or take a jet to do some hiking, but you are going to go over every square foot of that ground ”before you carry on with your opinion in this website”. That is the only way I will accept from you the proof needed that the ark doesn’t exist.
They really are a nice bunch of people, aren’t they. In fact, most of them make SlimVirgin look positively angel-like.