Bible Translation Schlafly Style


So, I know Andy reads this blog (or has done in the past) so I’m not sure if this is a response to what I said below. Anyway, Andy has gone on to “defend” his statement. I use inverted commas, because Andy’s version of defend runs along the lines of “I’m right – you’re wrong; you’re a liberal and need to open your mind; Oh look, Terry Koeckritz has blocked you.”

To whit, the insane one rambles:

Thank you for your comment, but it illustrates how the medical misunderstanding of digestion persists even 2000 years after Jesus stated the real truth. It is not in Matthew 15:11 where Jesus explained why it is not necessary always to wash one’s hands before eating, but somewhere in Mark (I think).

Good hygiene is helpful and has extended lifespan, but usually not by protecting the digestive system. The digestive system is powerful enough to destroy nearly everything that is harmful. The reason people are told today to wash their hands is typically not to protect what they eat, but to avoid spreading to their eyes and nose and others, particularly to those with weak immune systems.–[[User:Aschlafly|Andy Schlafly]] 10:27, 11 July 2010 (EDT)

Erm, ok Andy, so you’re making a claim on Conservapedia, and you don’t even know the source for your claim. (Again, why am I not surprised).

As for my one-word answer to your insanity: Gastroenteritis.

Actually, having done a bit of research myself, it’s clear to see that Andy has once again messed up on his Bible translation, possibly due to his habit of skimming, but probably due to his monumental ignorance. The verse in question comes from Mark 7 and reads:

And there assembled together unto him the Pharisees and some of the scribes, coming from Jerusalem. 2 And when they had seen some of his disciples eat bread with common, that is, with unwashed hands, they found fault. 3 For the Pharisees and all the Jews eat not without often washing their hands, holding the tradition of the ancients. 4 And when they come from the market, unless they be washed, they eat not: and many other things there are that have been delivered to them to observe, the washings of cups and of pots and of brazen vessels and of beds. 5 And the Pharisees and scribes asked him: Why do not your disciples walk according to the tradition of the ancients, but they eat bread with common hands? 6 But he answering, said to them: Well did Isaiah prophesy of you hypocrites, as it is written: This people honours me with their lips, but their heart is far from me. 7 And in vain do they worship me, teaching doctrines and precepts of men.

They even provide the original Greek, so Andy and Terry Hurlbut can use their pocket dictionary to translate it.

What makes it funny is that for somebody who has translated the Bible, Andy can’t pick up on the symbolism comparing the Jews (with their washed hands) to the Gentiles, who are unwashed. In other words, the Pharisees are objecting to Jesus and the disciples sitting down to eat with Gentiles. The evil Wikipedia goes on to explain a bit further:

He calls people to listen to them and explains that “Nothing outside a man can make him ‘unclean’ by going into him. Rather, it is what comes out of a man that makes him ‘unclean.'”  Later his disciples (students) tell him they didn’t understand him and he scolds them for being “dull”. He explains to them that food can’t make you unclean but “What comes out of a man is what makes him ‘unclean.’ For from within, out of men’s hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance and folly.”

You’d think that somebody who had translated the Bible would be able to tell between allegory and reality. Then again, Andrew Schlafly has only a passing relationship with reality at the best of times. Andy’s missed the point that the Pharisees – or intellectuals as Andy would have it – are upset that Jesus and the disciples are eating with a bunch of Gentiles, with unclean hands, rather than with Jews, who wash their hands before eating. It’s got nothing to do with cleanliness, but rather who they are eating with. Jesus is making a statement that it doesn’t matter who he associates with.

About PsyGremlin

PsyGremlin is a former Conservapedia sysop (although the position was earned nefariously), stand up comedian, DJ, and is currently a self-employed financial adviser, who impersonates a responsible adult at least 5 days a week. However, highlighting and poking fun at the crazies out there remains his first love. Well besides pork crackling. And custard. And cricket.
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2 Responses to Bible Translation Schlafly Style

  1. Pi says:

    If Andy thinks “the digestive system is powerful enough to destroy nearly everything that is harmful” he should take a trip to India and drink the water. It is not the digestive system, it is the immune system. You have to be immune to the bacteria in the water to be able to drink it, your digestive system is not going to help you.

    • cpmonitor says:

      Good point – thanks for raising it. Actually I think that’s worth a WIGO.

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