When Insanity Finally Outweighs Relevance


Well, I knew this day would come eventually and in a way, I’m surprised that it’s taken this long. However, I’ve decided that I’m no longer going to devote any more column space to Andrew Schlafly’s little bastion of insanity and bigotry, Conservapedia…  unless they do something of mind-numbing stupidity, of course. But then it would have to be on a level comparable to the Lenski dialogue, or the Conservative Bible, before I’d take note.

Even though Conservapedia is the reason for this blog’s very existence in the first place, we’ve evolved (ahem!) and broadened our scope, and it’s become apparent that there are far better lunatics out there and Conservapedia’s use as an interesting – or even amusing – source has come to an end. Then again, to say “end” would imply there was a beginning and let’s face it, Conservapedia – as the bastion of right-wing knowledge and thought Schlafly fantasises about – never got out of the blocks. From the get go the right-wing masses never appeared, indeed they actively seemed to shun it; it became the laughing stock of the scientific, sane and – after the Conservative Bible – religious community; and even the home-schoolers, for whom it was originally created, have abandoned the project en masse.  Even the current batch of students being subjected to Schlafly’s abysmal courses, seem to use the site for the sole purpose of posting their homework answers. Which makes you wonder if they even exist – there’s been a couple of much-hyped courses that have mysteriously stopped after a few weeks. Which makes you wonder if they even existed in the first place.

Not only that, but the format didn’t suit the mentality of his target market – these are people with chips on both shoulders, who really, really want the world to know how pissed off they are that there’s a Black Man in the White House. They have neither the inclination, not the mental capacity, to write articles for something that purports to be an encyclopaedia. That’s why the new Teabagger Facebook will be successful… provided they can raise the funds to keep it going (last month they raised $10,000 out of a requested $30,000. Now they’re asking for another $30,000, but with no expiry date)… there they can post without having to engage what passes for their brains.

When you add the fact that of the remaining hand-picked goons running the site, only Schlafly seems to care. Terry Hurlbut only uses it to promote his own blog; ditto Ken Demyer, who happily clutters up the main page with inane posts linking to his pitiful Question Evolution blog, where he fantasises about crushing atheism and mythical long-haired, creationist sweethearts write him sweet letters, in 2nd grade standard English; Brian Macdonald has taken over from the late Terry Koeckriz in banning everything that moves and Ed Poor shows occasionally, to either destroy what’s left of their maths articles, or to add vaguely disturbing sexual content to the “family-friendly” encyclopaedia’s pages.

So, before I close the book on Conservapedia for – hopefully – the last time, I’d like to close off with a bit more insanity from its founder, Andrew Schlafly – probably the single biggest reason why Conservapedia failed to begin with.

Not withstanding his current fixation on how Einstein’s Theory of Relativity and the underlying e=mc2 formula are all liberal claptrap, designed to stop people reading the Bible – something questions by saying that if he eats a pound of cake, his energy doesn’t increase by the weight of the cake, multiplied by the speed of light squared. This from somebody with a B.Sc, remember, Schlafly has another little pet theory.

It seems that communist are scared to admit their leaders have died, because they “have no incentive to risk challenge to their power by announcing that he passed away.” This is what is says in Conservapedia’s article on Fidel Castro, which is written entirely in the past sense, because Castro “is presumably no longer alive as of December 2009.” Needless to say, once Schlafly has pronounced on something, it becomes the One and Only Infallible Truth and shall not be proven wrong. Which results in much hilarity as Schlafly twists reality to match his Truth. Thus, when Castro met the Pope, Schlafly responded with the hysterical “Mystery:Did a Fake Fidel Castro Meet the Pope?” – because body doubles are far more plausible than saying “Oops, I made a mistake.”

It seems that Schlafly’s only basis for this death “cover-up” line is that an elderly, ill man hasn’t been seen in public for a while. In fact, he uses exactly the same logic on Hugo Chavez, claiming that “Chavez was not seen in public since he entered a Cuban hospital near death on December 11, 2012. Venezuela’s communist regime engaged in liberal denial about his death for nearly three months, even releasing a photo of an ostensibly fit and smiling Chavez. But on March 5, 2013, likely due to pressure from other nations that knew Chavez had died, Venezuelan communists finally admitted Chavez was dead.”

Because, saying somebody is still alive, when they are still alive, is liberal denial.

It wouldn’t be Schlafly if he didn’t engage in some grave dancing, so when Chavez actually died on March 5th, Schlafly not only posted the following on Conservapedia’s main page:

Conservapedia is proven right: HUGO CHAVEZ IS DEAD, and the lamestream media finally admit it.
Liberal denial crashes again.

Main Page - Conservapedia_20130425_082336

He goes on to update the “Conservapedia Proven Right” article with the following:

Prediction: “”The liberal media go along with the communist cover-up about Hugo Chavez, despite how he likely died in a Cuban hospital in December.”

“Liberal claptrap” in response: “The liberal media go along with the communist cover-up about Hugo Chavez, despite how he likely died in a Cuban hospital in December.” (Note how he’s somehow claiming that the media is somehow responding to something Schlafly said, whereas in reality, most of them don’t even know he’s alive.)

Result: “Hugo Chavez is indeed dead, the BBC finally admits nearly two months after Conservapedia had already informed the world of that fact.”

The “logic” behind this is so flawed, that I would seriously not want this Harvard-educated lawyer representing me in court. He’s basically saying that because somebody ill died several months after Schlafly said he had died, that Schlafly has been proven right.

There really isn’t anywhere else to go when faced with this kind of messianic insanity, so I won’t be going here again.

About PsyGremlin

PsyGremlin is a former Conservapedia sysop (although the position was earned nefariously), stand up comedian, DJ, and is currently a self-employed financial adviser, who impersonates a responsible adult at least 5 days a week. However, highlighting and poking fun at the crazies out there remains his first love. Well besides pork crackling. And custard. And cricket.
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8 Responses to When Insanity Finally Outweighs Relevance

  1. Arthur Adams says:

    I would submit that CP’s slide into complete irrelevance was marked by the Conservative Bible Project. Before that, it was still somewhat resembling American conservative thought. Even the Lenski dialogue, while some fellow conservatives might have said, “you’re pushing this too far”, was still reflective of Religious Right’s belief about evolution.

    But trying to create your own Bible translation — without knowledge of Greek or Latin, or any theological training beyond regular church attendance — and casually disregarding passages because you think they’re “liberal”, that’s what led even much of the American right to say “this guy is nuts.”

    • PsyGremlin says:

      I’d be inclined to agree with you. Like you said, Schlafly did spout most of the typical right-wing drivel, but just in a strange way (Obama’s Muslim because he doesn’t dance; black holes are bad because they stop people reading the Bible) but it was the CBP that a) finally displayed that he has a very warped view of the world and what conservatism is and b) alienated him from the last bunch of people who might have been on his side.

      Before the CBP, CP was a bit of an in-joke, sniggered about in corners. After the CBP, it was the laughing stock of the internet.

  2. armondikov says:

    Now, the open question is this: will RationalWiki die too, or is there enough momentum in the non-CP side of it to keep going? There’s insistence from people that CP is still a big part of it, but edits to the CP-space are minuscule and WIGO:CP updates a few times a month these days in contrast to World, Blog and Clog that are constantly fresh and the Saloon Bar turns over conversations much faster. And besides, Roko’s Basilisk is far more hilarious than the CBP.

    So, post-CP, here we (finally) come?

    • PsyGremlin says:

      Yeah I think so – it’s built up enough momentum and credibility in other areas to outlive CP.

      That said, I think we can say that RW is finally clear of CP when things like WIGO world and WIGO clogs start attracting the same number of votes. For all the fact that interest in CP is diminishing, the WIGO still seems to get a lot of attention. But the talk page is mostly people pointing and laughing at Ken these days.

      • armondikov says:

        *But*, consider the turnover of stories. Those CP ones are up there at the top for days on end. It’s almost a no brainer that they’ll attract more votes in any direction. So it’s difficult to compare in that respect.

      • armondikov says:

        Actually, just checked WIGO:CP for the first time in ages. A modest half dozen entries for March so far, but with the exception of the Chavez one (which is to be expected) the up/down voting scores aren’t that much higher than the other WIGO entries for the last week or two. It’s time that people just pulled their ends out of the sand over this one.

        • PsyGremlin says:

          Yeah. I mean if I can give up on CP, then I think it’s time RW can move on too. That said, and I think this is where most of the resistance stems from, I don’t think all the old CP articles should summarily be deleted, as much as Ty would like them to be. There’s a lot of history and batshit insanity tucked away in there.

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